When you have a choice that needs to be made?

I am partially employed because I am disabled and in the appeals process for Social Security Disability.  I can only earn a little bit of money.  I work causal for the same job I worked at when my disease progressed to what it is today. I work on an as needed basis and although my job is pretty regular I often times lose money because I'm sick and must call off.  When that happens I must often choose between rent and gas.  I will always choose gas because I need electricity and water and when it is warmer the gas is only heating up the water.  I didn't owe that much and I could get help from Charity.  Well Charity is dependent on donations and because donations are down that means I did not receive help.  I then contacted my gas company and had them fax the medical form that would help keep my gas on.  She did fill it out but it was to late because they shut off my gas. 

The horrible thing about waiting for Disability is they deny everyone unless you have heart problems or are on Oxygen.  I was first turned down in 2010 when it was discovered that I had Sarcoidosis, an autoimmune disease that caused me to have Splenic Cancer.  I lost my spleen on September 24, 2010. That is how they diagnosed my condition. They denied me and I appealed.  I lost my case and I went back to work.  I was fine for a few years although I still suffered from nausea and pain.  I was OK and was able to hold down a job for three years.

On March 7,2015 I passed out at work and my co worker had to call an ambulance.  It was then that I found out I had something wrong with my heart, and kidneys.  They also discovered that my immune system was failing.  I spent months going from specialist to specialist. I had to many people on my immune system with my kids and grandchildren, 7 Co Workers, and 8 Consumers in small homes. I lived with my children and grandchildren in a small house and I worked in a house with 7 Co Workers and 8 Consumers in tight quarters.  I put in my 2 weeks notice on 7/10/15 and my last day was July 24, 2015.  I never wanted to quit but I felt I had no choice.

I was given Unemployment but when that ran out I had no income.  My best friend helped me make ends meet and paid all but my rent. I did not have an income from Feb15 until June when I got a check for $60.  I have been working every sense when I could but still became homeless.  I have spoken out about that before.


Now I have a decent place to live but when I get sick and miss work I am forced to make a decision no one would ever want to make. I had to chose between gas or rent.  Now I am waiting on the Gas Company to work with me because it is cold in the house.  My Social worker and Nurse was there the day the gas got cut off and they called CYF who because the house had one space heater in my granddaughter's room that they found the conditions to be safe.  I have figured out to make heat until CRISIS opens up on November 1, 2017 and working with the gas company to get it on faster than that.  I am not able to work full time as I can barely walk now and have Congestive Heart Failure along with Liver Disease.


Social Security is something you pay into every pay day and for them to make you go through hoops trying to get something you paid into makes me sick.  My hearing is on November 21, 2017 in Pittsburgh PA and I pray it comes through for me because I do not know what I will do.

Money Management a Skill that doesn't exist in the Hood.

In February of 2017 my friend Carol asked me if I budget my money. I do know what a budget is because of my job but I didn't do one for myself. Carol talked to me about saving money and putting away money for an Emergency. At the moment I don't have enough to save. I make just enough to pay my bills and for needs. However, I should be getting a settlement shortly and then I will be able to start a Savings Account.

Now I think before I purchase anything. Carol taught me to ask myself if I need it or want it? If its a need then put it in the budget if it is s want then no if I didn't budget for it. I find myself saying No a lot. Its hard to do that.

She asked me if my parents taught me to budget but they were poor so they didn't know themselves. My parents were generational poor like I am. We are barely taught basic subjects in school and often we are the victims of low expectations because research shows poor children have low IQs. Both of my parents were labeled Learning Disabled. My parents are not alone so many poor people are never taught how to balance their check books. I get paid on a pre paid debit card. I do not have a checking account.

Maybe if we had these skills we would put a part of income tax check in Savings and not lose an Utility later in the year.

The Urban League who helps poor people get a Security Deposit does require a Financial class that teaches budgeting but no one else does.

Carol, is my Accountability partner if she says she doesn't advise it. I don't do it. Its hard and I'm sure mistakes will be made but its a good idea to do this.

Research into Poverty and Eliminating Poverty

A big topic of the last campaign was elimating income inequality ( a feel good term replacing Poverty). You cannot get rid of poverty its not going anywhere. Not one Country on Earth has gotten rid of poverty no matter how hard they try. Its not gonna happen because life isn't fair some people have money and some people don't. Poor people are not sad people with hard lives. We are not pitiful creatures who must be saved. We do not want the Government to take care of us, we want jobs to take care of ourselves.

I am researching Poverty and the effects of poverty. Most of what I found were incomplete because it followed children. The adults weren't separated in groups such as Urban Poor or Rural Poor. How does the Red Neck and the Hood Rat differ? They don't follow the children tested to see if most kids who lived in poverty got out and what percentage stayed.

The study I read talk about lower cognitive skills and education. The rates of Learning Disabilities were increased in children born into poverty. Yet they couldn't tell you why. To bad none of them thought to ask the parents of the children if they knew why.  Poverty a produces Food Emergencies and when you are hungry you can't learn. Yes the kids have free lunch and for the children in grades K through 8 have breakfast and they help but the children know they may not have dinner unless their parents could get to a food bank or help from other poor people. Poor children worry about financial problems of the household because besides hunger utilities are often off. The electricity being off means they must get dressed in the dark. The water being off means they must get water (mainly older kids) they must carry heavy jugs from their friends or family until the bills can be paid and services restored. Having Gas off in the winter means they are cold even with electric heat its cold. Stressed children have difficulty learning.

The problem no one wants to talk about is the public schools that serve poor kids.  Some teachers hate poor children they may be dirty, hungry, and they never have school supplies. The teacher may wish she had students who didn't have so many problems. Maybe they don't want to waste their times on "dumb" children. Most teachers are frustrated because they know the parents can't afford things like pencils and the School Board will not purchase pencils. This leaves the teacher themselves to purchase teachers and papers. This is beginning to change and both Churches and Non Profits are having book bag give aways. Its a wonderful thing for children and their parents. Children are embarrassed when they don't have money.

The requirement of Uniforms is another problem because of the expense. Uniforms should never be required at any public school because parents can't afford them. Schools that require them have truency problems. This ends up with the parents ending up in jail. The kids miss because the one uniform ends up dirty. Kids skip because no one wants to be laughed at.

When you have issues like this your study on cognitive abilities make sense. Its the Poverty issues stupid to quote Bill Clinton.