Fussing, fighting death

Yesterday, was chilly but beautiful outside. I was at working my seventh day in a row. I decided to turn on Facebook during my lunch. The first status was from my nephew's girlfriend, who is his babies’ mom. It was a trash talking status about my nephew. My niece responded because her kids were being talking about.

This began to spiral out of control and continued well into the evening. It involved several family members. A fist fight broke out between the sisters of my nephew's girlfriend and the wife of my other nephew. She fought several of them and still won.

Later that evening my sister called me.  She told me that my nephew, who is serving time in the County jail while he waits to go "upstate,"" was stabbed 17 times. I helped raise him and his brothers and sisters. I felt my heart break.

I was on Messenger with my friend and teacher Carol. "Something happened to Riq," I told her. She has been writing to him in jail.

The family has a lot of questions like how come someone in Protective Custody at one of the largest County jails in the Country, could be stabbed 17 times? Why did an inmate at the jail call the family instead of the County jail?

This has got to change. We have to stop fighting about dumb nonsense. Most fights in Da Hood are over dumb and petty things. Most shootings and homicides are over stupid shit that would soon be forgotten. I won't lie; this has been my lifestyle for at least 45 years. Fighting and violence. Everyone picks on the poor and we take it out on each other.

We are going to continue to have these problems if we don't stop this self-destructive behavior. We better love each other even if no one else does.

Education is not for us. The ways Urban America hurts each other

Every day in every ghetto in America you have ghetto people telling other ghetto people things such as "Education ain't for us." "You talk like a white girl." "They don't like for us to have education. " We hold each other back because we were so poorly educated by the Public School System. We have no or little belief in the Education system because of what abuse it gave us. We were ignored and dismissed. First of all Black folks always had a middle class and even wealthy members of these income brackets. Yes even during slavery times. Second poor white children face the same difficulties as poor black children do. Third who is THEY and why do you care what they say? Do we not have the same rights as everyone else? I was real happy to be learning something when a fellow sister from another hood told me Education wasn't for us and they aren't going to let you leave the Hood. I get it, I really do, we don't want people to leave us but why anyone would think I would leave my people and 15104 is beyond me but I digress. People leave the Hood every day to fill our Prisons it is these folks we need to stop from leaving the Hood not those that may come back and actually help. We have many problems and we need educated people to help solve our problems not middle class but the young man in the Projects. We will continue to have difficulties unless we stop putting each other down when we do better for ourselves and celebrate instead of tear them down.

My Journey So far

]I was educated in an Inner City school in the 70s. Although most of the teachers were great some were not. 

I didn't learn as quickly as others so I was ignored by most of the teaching staff and passed ahead despite lacking basic skills just because I wasn't a problem.

I always knew I lacked a basic education but the shame made me pretend.
I could read well and I could even write so I was successful in hiding it.
My friend Carol realized I lacked basic math skills and questioned me about my education I told her the teachers said there was something wrong with my brain.  She grew angry but not with me. 

"How far did you get in school," she asked.

"I graduated," I said.

"You have to be kidding me," she said becoming angry again.

"I'll teach you," she said. "I'll see what you know."

After teaching me Carol told me I was smart.  Today after reading this she wanted me to add. 
"Helen is as smart as a whip. Not educating her was a disservice to her and to our world,"

She began by giving me Vocabulary words and I would look them up giving her the definition, parts of speech,  and use it in a sentence.

She is now teaching me history starting at the beginning of human history. 

She has me learning how to write Poems,  essays,  and book reports.  I'm reading Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. I have learned most of my multiplication and division tables.

She gives me a lot of homework and instruction enough to kill an average high school kid. I do every bit. Not bad for a soon to be 53 year old.

The Hidden Shame of Having a Poor Education

I've mentioned before that poor children especially those that attend inner city schools are not being educated correctly. 
Even in wealthier school districts poor children in the ghettos are not getting the proper education due to racism and crashing.
I'm 52 years old who graduated from High School without the following skills Multiplication, Division,  Fractions,  and Decimals. I can barely add or subtract.  I was told by several teachers that they tried their best but my brain just couldn't work right enough to learn these skills.  Professional teachers spent years trying to teach me what took an artist in Maine, Carol Douglas,  one day to teach me.  I learned my 3 and 4 tables in one day.
So my brain wouldn't work for the teachers but worked for Carol Douglas. It was then I realized that I was a victim of a society who does not want to educate the poor. 
To many teachers look at poor children and assume they either do not have the capacity to learn or they don't have the parental support.
I had both but they used my so called Learning Disabilities as an excuse for not teaching me basic skills. I have had to live with that decision all my life. 
I spent years coming up with ways to hide the fact that my math skills were poor.  I hid the fact that I did not know my multiplication tables.
I believed their lie until a few days ago when Carol taught me my 3 and 4 tables. I knew then it was a lie. 
A woman from Rockport, Maine decided to give me the Education that the Commonwealth of PA and the General Braddock and Woodland Hills school district did not.

Housewarming Party in the Hood

On Saturday I had a Housewarming party to celebrate my new house. Bell Avenue was quiet all day until my first guests came they all hell broke loose. My first guests were folks from my church. They informed me some man from across the street ODed. Of course I run on Hood Time so I wasn't quite ready despite cooking and cleaning all day. My kitchen table collapsed and the hot grease from the fried chicken spilled all over the floor. My pastor cleaned it up for me. We looked out of my kitchen window and saw several police cars. My very ghetto and racially mixed family showed up next so everyone in the house was white, black, and Hispanic. The police standoff and DEA raid across the street lasted for the entire time of my party which ended at 9 PM. The people who live in the hood are used to this type of thing happening. I had a good time despite the tiny disaster with my table and the police raid outside my door

Writing My Life Story

I am currently writing my life story as I'm writing it I realized I actually saddle the two eras of the ghetto. 
I was born in 1964 four years before the first changing events of the ghetto The MLK riots of 1968.
I grew up in the 70s in North Braddock PA.  I still remember the good old days before everything went horribly wrong in the Hood .
I was a young adult of 22 when the Hood became the violent war zone it is today. I was old enough to see some horrible stuff like torture. 
Most of our problems started after the MLK riots.  Drugs began to flood the neighborhood and folks in the Hood believe the Government flooded the ghettos with drugs to keep us from causing to many problems for the Country and to keep us quiet.  I have no problem believing them after some things I've seen.
I realized that the story of my life is the story of the ghetto in the second half of the 20th century and the first 17 years of the 21St century.

Inner City Education

This is the third time I wrote this Blogger can not find my picture.
I went to an inner city school district 98% of the students received free or reduced lunches. 
The buildings were in disrepair and school supplies were in short supplies.
Most of the teachers were wonderful people who often had to purchase school supplies in order to teach the kids
Some teachers we're cruel while others were lazy.  My fourth grade teacher grouped her students by income level the poorest students we're placed into the group she called the Dummy group.  The Dummies had to do all the physical labor.  We had to wait until the other kids ate before we ate because we had to throw away their food.  Often times she never allowed us time to eat. We didn't have a lunch room. I finally told my mother who told the other parents and they reported the teacher they did not fire her and we we're ignored the rest of the year.
We had a teacher in Junior High  who read newspapers drank coffee and fed the roaches while we drew math
I learned how to write an outline this week my friend who is tutoring me now said I was a quick studies and one of the best students she ever taught.  I know I'm not the only smart person from the Hood and as I told my friend picture what I could have done with a real Education.